There is such a backstory to this post it’s not even funny.
Unless I actually tell the story.
Which I believe I shall…
It all started not so long ago, in a little town of no consequence, where a Young Man lived. ”What kind of young man?” you might ask, to which I would respond, “No no, not a young man but a Young Man.” And you might ask, “Well, what could the difference possibly be?” At which point I would be obliged to mention that language is a veritable hornet’s nest of dangers the likes of which no one can imagine. And certainly no 1 can, or any other number for that matter. For you see, this Young Man might be mistaken for a young man, a Jung man, or anything else at all if one was careless. And we mustn’t have that.
Well, in some ways this Young Man was rather peculiar. And in some other ways he was perfectly ordinary. But I suppose that’s not very helpful, is it? For not only does that tell you absolutely nothing useful it’s also simply not that interesting.
“If he’s not interesting then why are we talking about him?”
Well, that’s a good question really, one for which I have no immediate answer. I suppose the first thing that comes to mind is when is conversation ever really that interesting in the first place? I mean, honestly…words, talking…respiration, salivation…diphthongs and fricatives shooting every which way, willy-nilly!
Nonono-let us not talk about words…for why would one want to talk about words? As if words are something to talk about.
But the Young Man. Yes, the Young Man! You had nearly forgotten about him, hadn’t you? That’s not surprising considering he often forgets himself.
Let us return to him for a moment, or perhaps longer, and describe a small portion of his predicament. For you see, this Young Man, while not busy by perhaps a modern working person’s standards, has certain commitments, activities…hobbies, really, that he chooses to engage in on a regular basis. Not very interesting I know…but you must be patient! This account, which I promise I shall be getting to quite shortly, concerns one of these activities, an agreement you might say, between this Young Man and one of his compatriots, a Young Woman. This Young Man and this Young Woman did not live very close together, but this did not stop them from being friends, on the contrary! It perhaps caused their friendship to be more malleably durable than most.
Because of this after some years of not speaking so much this Young Man and Young Woman were able to be as close friends as ever, and they were indeed close. No, the friendship was close, not the Young Man and the Young Woman, I already said they didn’t live very close together! Do pay attention, will you?
Now this agreement concerned the matter of music, a glorious and devilish matter if ever there was one. Being great devotees of this most (un)holy of religions they agreed to partake in a small experiment, involving the communal appreciation of the aforementioned demigod. Rules for the experiment were set down and mutually agreed upon as follows, and I do quote directly here (as if there was any other kind of way to quote):
One song each.
One reason why.
And so, one week, the Young Man which so much of our story is concerned with (and do believe me, it’s a concern not without good cause) was distressed due to the fact that he had not yet fulfilled his half of the agreement. And the week was nearly drawn to a close!
Now this sounds like a rather dire situation for our poor young hero, if you’d like to call him that, and I’m sure he’d like that even if you wouldn’t. But rest assured, and I don’t mean to give too much away here but…this story has a happy ending.
While the Young Man was not always responsible he was indeed clever, and mostly well-organized. A deliberate sort of creature, when he had the notion to be. And so he had not one but two songs prepared, just in case. And the Young Man and I both sincerely apologize to anyone named Justin Case who may be reading this for any inconvenience that we may have caused you.
However, and this is where things get a bit tricky, upon attempting to share his first choice of song the Young Man discovered, much to his shock and dismay, that he could not. “Why not?” you might ask.
“I might ask why I keep asking such banal questions.”
That’s true. You might…
Anyhow…the Young Man was frustrated beyond belief, for you see he was limited by his knowledge of this advanced and newfangled invention known as the “computer.” And while computers possess no innate intelligence neither do the people who create them. And while he had a recording of this melodious and enjoyable song to share alas! ’Twas the wrong file format.
After much ado of clicking and reading of text the Young Man determined it would be impossible to share his first song of choice, and that he would be required to default to his second choice, which I assure you is no less worthy than his first! And certainly no more worthy, either.
But here is the exciting part…or at least as exciting as anything can be, mind you. He needed to obtain a Compact Disc from inside of his horseless carriage, which was immediately outside of his place of residence. And while wearing nothing but a T-shirt and shorts he walked briskly (only to match the temperature of the frigid air, of course)out the door to where the vehicle was parked, obtained the disc, placed it into his computer, imported it in the correct MP3 file format, and shared the wonder and delight that is:
Blonde Redhead’s “Here Sometimes”